My 3 Monsters: Stop the Insanity!!!

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1.25.2009

Stop the Insanity!!!

Sooooo . . . you may have noticed that I don't post very many pictures of myself. OK, like none. I'm just going to lay it all on the line here. We're friends, right? And Oprah (whom I loooove, not!) says you can't change what you don't acknowledge and embrace, so . . . . I'm a monster. I'm gaining weight like crazy. I have adult acne. And age spots. And bags under my eyes. And hair on my chin. It's not pretty.

Now, I've never been a skinny, winsome girl. Ever. I've been a size 10/12 most of my adult life and I've made peace with that. In every other aspect I am the very picture of health. But this past year I am beginning to feel like I'm falling apart. I have trouble sleeping at night, hence the bags under my eyes, but I could spend the entire day in bed. I am gaining weight every day. Seriously. Like half a pound a day. I am (almost literally) bursting out of my fat clothes. What is wrong with me?! The only thing that has changed in the past twelve months is the anti-anxiety medication I started taking and turning 35. Both have the possible unfortunate side effect of weight gain. I guess I've been doubly blessed. AAAAARRRGGGH!

I am finding it rather difficult to make peace with this new me. I WORK IN A GYM FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! Do you know how much it stinks to be the fat girl working at the gym?! And I was already that at the top of my game! Maybe it's time to go back to the doctor and re-evaluate my medication or my health in general. And PLEASE tell me this is not peri-menopause. I don't think I could bear the thought.

5 comments:

  1. I feel your pain (and cravings). Would you and Brent (and anyone else in the family) want to do a Family Biggest Loser? It would be hard to do it by % of weight lost because we wouldn't all be using the same scale, but we could do a VERY SPECIFIC point system for exercise, cutting out snacks/junkfood, not eating after dinner, eating out, etc... I would be all for it since I love a little friendly competition (it keeps me motivated) and we could have a monetary prize at the end (everyone put in $25+ and winner takes all). We could check in with each other via email every week. Accountability is always a real push for me to stay on track. What do ya think?

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  2. I agree with Kristen, competition always motivates me. I think we could do both the %weight loss if we use the same scale every time we weigh and point system for healthy habits such as Kristen mentioned and exercise. We could put the %weight loss on a point system as well and total into the other points. When we have committed competitors, each of us could submit a point system plan and we choose as a group which one we will use. I'm in, including the $25. Money also motivates me.

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  3. Sweet! Sounds good to me. Brent will be in, too, I'm sure. The only time either of us has ever lost weight is when we were competing against each other. I'm game.

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  4. I soooo feel your pain. And I think you're beautiful, hairy chin and all.

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  5. I am not doing the Greatest Loser for kicks. I feel the pain too. Now on an almost daily basis. Let us know how the family Biggest Loser goes. That sounds fun in a painful way too.

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